FOR CHILDREN WHO KEEP BANGING

She is seventeen

         and bangs her head

on walls

         she bangs her head

her hands until

         when they’re

raw they tie her down.

They tie her down

         until when they can

do nothing with

         her they seclude her

in institutions

         where still nobody

can do nothing

         they sign papers

tucking her

         down on the table

leather straps

         and tie her brain

to the sound

         of a second

waves going

         through her head

they call electroshock

         each time

a little more

         electrocution

they carry her

         on carts

her heart

is damaged

         until there

is nothing

         more she

still bangs

         her head

until

         there is no more

thought

left

         is the way they

         want her

         with no more

courage

         she has nothing

left

         her heart

is broken

         against the side

of her head

And it is like

the little

         girl

they left in

         a closet

and didn’t

feed her

         and left

with not enough

she too

         a little

day each more

         she died

until she no

         longer

cried.

I watched

         her then

just a little

girl, age twelve,

         and no more

nothing they could

         no more

         if they tried

do something more;

She died then

         a little girl

         not to cry

anymore,

         and like

I know these

         little girls

like I know

         myself

just crying

         and trying

to remember

         the last time

the leather

         strap came

down is when

         I started

banging back

         only my

head kept dying

is when the

         thought of

         death when

the hands reach

         out

only they’re

so scarred

         from banging. . .

These little

         girls

keep calling me

         now

sometimes I wish

         they’d stop.

Don’t call me

Don’t call me

but still the

         telephone rings

with a little

         girl. . .

Somehow we together

         if we try

can call back

         to her.

Somehow if we

         stop sitting

here we can

         take away

the leather straps,

the metal plates,

take away

the tables

and the empty

rooms and maybe

         together if we

         take away

all the

empty answers

         and all the

filled up institutions

         maybe if we

keep trying to

         tear down

what people

don’t know

         we can

reach out

         with our hands

if we get

close enough to

Touch

         If we Touch

This is what we

         Have

For children

         who keep

banging. . .

This is the

         answer.


BLUEBIRD